Our first 6 weeks grading period ended last Friday, and the grades are
officially locked in place. We gave a cumulative math exam on Friday,
and I was pretty pleased with the results overall. In my morning class,
all 22 kids passed (above 70), and in the afternoon class, I still had
a 30, a 45, and a few in the 60s, but the others did well -- and that
one kid went from a 17 to an 80!
I'm starting to think there's hope yet.
This
week has been rough, as we've given benchmark tests every morning.
However, for the limited time we've had, the kids have done pretty well
each day. Granted, we are going over 2 and 3 digit addition with
regrouping, something that should be pretty easy for them. But they are
all showing their work and making the effort, so that's nice to see.
Tomorrow
is the math benchmark. Typically, these things are atrocious,
especially the first one of the year, but I have high hopes. My kids
know place value. They know how to round. They know how to write a
number in word form and expanded form. Most of them understand how to
find a missing number in a pattern. These are the things that should be
tested. The problem usually arises in the wording of the questions.
Some of them are ridiculously over-worded or use vocabulary that nobody
outside of Harvard would ever use.
I seem to recall a question one year that asked, "What time does Tommy go to folklorien class?"
I thought for quite a bit before writing this post today. I certainly
don't want to come across as seeming immodest or bragging, but I went
through a very unique experience today (at least for me), and I really
wanted to blog about it.
I might possibly have saved a guy's life today.
OK, there, I said it. There's the immodesty part of the post. Sorry.
Today
was a student holiday/staff development day. We sat in the cafeteria
all day long while we had a math meeting, watched some required videos,
filed papers in students' cumulative folders, etc. When it came time
for our lunch break, my colleague, Mrs. Math, and I went to the nearby
Taco Bell for some delicious and healthy food.
We had eaten our
food and were sitting around talking when I started hearing some odd
sounds coming from someone behind me. Progressively louder burps, odd
gurgling sounds, throat clearing, and so on. At one point, I whispered
to Mrs. Math, "What the heck is going on behind me?" Instead of saying
something along the lines of, "Some weirdo making disturbing sounds,"
she started describing the wallpaper behind the guy.
Not long
after, the sounds started really getting to me, so I suggested that we
leave. As we stood up, the sounds from behind became markedly more
choking-like, and I turned to see the guy. He was definitely choking
and turning red.
I don't really remember what I asked the guy --
I know I didn't say, "Are you choking?" like you're supposed to. I
think I just said, "Are you ok?" But it was clear that he wasn't.
I
think of the Heimlich Maneuver in the same way I think of CPR and
driving stick shift -- I know how to do these things IN THEORY.
Actually putting them into practice is another matter, though.
It
was pretty obvious that this guy needed help fast, however, so my
worries about breaking a rib were short-lived, and I stepped over to
the guy and did my best version of the Heimlich on him. The first
thrust seemed to work, as a lot of crap came out of his mouth. But when
I pulled away and asked if that got it, he shook his head vigorously.
So I did it a couple more times, finally getting a little more out.
And that was pretty much it. The guy thanked me, he actually offered to pay me, I declined, and we left.
And to think, we probably would have had a boring old time had we gone to Subway instead...
As we enter the 5th week of school (and half my class is out sick --
not to mention the principal, the CRC, the nurse, and several other
teachers), I realize that many and most of my posts here on my blog
have been negative, complaining, or at least depressing. There's no
doubt that I am having a rough year, but this blog is supposed to be
about the OCCASIONAL rant, not the rant as norm.
Therefore, it's time for some humor. Or at least some attempted humor.
I thought I'd put together a little list of things that, despite all else, I haven't heard my kids utter this year. Yet.
1) What the heck are numbers?
2) Why is there green stuff shooting out of the toilets?
3) I think I should like to place myself in time-out, thank you very much.
4) This pencil is clearly of the finest quality!
5) What are those 2 lines? (referring to the equal sign)
6)
My mom says if somebody spits on me, I should spit on them. (Oh wait, I
DID hear that one this morning, from a little girl getting off the bus.)
7) Mmmmm!! Sloppy Gummy Bear Joe for lunch!!
8) Which end of the crayon colors?
9) Mister Teacher, I read your novel, Learn Me Good, this weekend, and it was awesome!
10) My parents let me have coffee and chocolate cake for breakfast!!
11) How much for your whole collection of markers?
12) Does this look infected to you?
13) Is Tequila a noun or a verb?
14) Par-kor!!
15) Let's play Golden Girls! I'll be Blanche!
16) The world is going to end in 2012 anyway, so why do we need to learn math?
17) My mortgage is killing me!
18) Something inside my desk is moving.
19) Kanye West is a jackass.
20) I got that question right. Where are the free hot dogs?
21) Edward or Jacob?
22) I lost a toe this weekend, doing long division.
23) Uh, I was told there would be no math.
digg_url="http://learnmegood2.blogspot.com/2009/09/down-with-sickness.html";
Is
it just me, or has this been the worst year for health in the
classroom? I have not felt well since school started on August 24th.
I've had a persistent cough, alternating runny/stuffy nose, watery
eyes, and a general head fog. Yet I don't think I have a cold or flu or
ebola -- I think it's just allergies from my really really awful
classroom.
Of course, it's not that true sickness is not going
around, so I could be mistaken. 3 of my homeroom kids were out sick
yesterday, along with one girl from my afternoon class. Plus one boy
who has been IN class for the past two days, but making loud retching
sounds before I finally convinced him to go to the bathroom if he was
going to throw up.
I had to stop my whole morning class
yesterday and do guided practice on how to cough and sneeze into the
crook of your elbow, and NOT into the general air supply, as had been
the norm.
Here in Dallas, there are people dying from Swine Flu,
regular flu, AND West Nile Virus!! I just want to survive the school
year!!
Summer is steadily slipping away, folks! So with that, I present to you the ANTI-Wong -- 20 things NOT to do on the first day of school.
1) Decide not to learn all of your children's names and just call them all "Kid."
2) Come to school dressed as a giant crayola crayon. Some teachers like to dress in costume, but nobody likes a corporate shill.
3) Sleep off a Nyquil-Vodka-Cherry Mountain Dew-induced hangover.
4) Update your Facebook status every 10 minutes.
5) Lecture the kids on how you could've had a V-8.
6) Pester the students for their honest review of your screenplay about intelligent rodents and the women who love them.
7) Mention The Girls Next Door.
8) Teach 8 ways to survive in prison.
9) Take the kids for a walk to the local quick-change oil lube joint.
10) Put on a viewing of The Godfather.
11) Run 10 fire drills back-to-back, followed by duck and cover.
12) Ask for their mother (or father)'s phone number for personal reasons.
13) Show off your prowess as an X-treme sport fanatic.
14) Try to have the kids solve the meaning of life.
15) Reenact the 100 Years War.
16) Model and try to sell your own personal brand of cologne or perfume.
17) Walk into the classroom at 8 o'clock, stare hard at the kids, and say, "You know what to do," and then leave the room for 4 hours.
18) Make a campfire and roast s'mores.
19) Consult a dog-eared, page-marked teacher handbook every 5 minutes.
20) Give the kids money for ANY reason.
Can anyone help me out with teacherlingo's create a post page? I haven't posted here in quite a while because I seem to have lost the ability to use rich text and hyperlinks. I used to have a whole task bar up on top with icons and everything, now all I get is a box for the subject and a box for the post. No options beyond that.
Any help is greatly appreciated!
On the last day of school, I cringed as I saw many kids doing the usual end-of-school activity of signing their shirts. I didn't used to mind this so much when there was no dress code, and most of the kids wore cheap white T-shirts (or at least, if another color, still cheap). But now with the dress code of collared shirts, I just don't want to be the one that approves using magic marker on something that the parents might not want decorated.
Some of these kids were wearing REALLY nice shirts too, with signatures all over them. A couple of kids even asked me if they could sign MY shirt! And my shirt was patterned, with multi-colored stripes! What are they thinking??
So as an alternative, when the kids came to my room, I gave them each a big sheet of colored construction paper. We folded them up multiple times, unfolded them, and then drew lines on the creases, creating a nice autograph page with many squares to sign.
I even made my own for each class so that I could capture the kids' signatures and thoughts.
Most of them signed their name and wrote something like, "Best teacher ever." I think that once the first kid wrote that, the others felt obligated.
One of my sneaky devils -- really a sweet kid, but always doing something exasperating -- wrote, "Thank you for teaching me everything you know." Um, I DO have a few more tricks in the tank, sonny, but thanks for the sentiment.
On one of the kids' pages, I wrote, "You are a math superstar!" For the rest of the day, I heard this boy going around telling his classmates, "I'm famous!" or "I'm a superstar!"
One boy asked for my phone number, and then a bunch of them chimed in to ask for it. I declined, not really wanting to have to answer my phone at all hours of the night...
We've been out of school for a week now. I do miss my kids, but I don't miss having to get up early every morning!
Hope everyone's having a great summer so far!!